Pudding Portal: An Akatsuki Crack
by Dreaded redhead sand-ninja
Summary: Well the Akatsuki make to the real world through a pudding portal, cause Hidan pissed off a witch. When they get 2 the World they find things are not as they seem. fangirls have to get them back to their world. Rated for Hidan, suggestions, and voilence.
1. How it all began

OK guess who's back! That's right it's me! The One, The Only…. Raya Unagi! AND HELL YA I GOT ANOTHER STORY FOR ALL YA! *laughs* Anyway This one I have a couple friends of mine in it andddd this is a special story! I'm not going into detail but I might as well Get on with the story. Right?

Tobi: Raya-chan does not own Naruto or her friends oc's… She owns only herself. X3

Good boy Tobi! Now on with the story!

"talking"

'thoughts'

**Alter egos or a side of Zetsu.**white zetsu **black zetsu**

_**Sarcasm**_

_**(author note)**_

*Prolog*

**It all started in the world of Naruto where the Akatsuki were going on a group mission. To destroy some witch who was considered a **_**threat**_**to the famous group of well know S-rank Villains… This Witch (imagine Blair from Soul Eater)… Was having a bunch of fun messing with them while staying above ground on her broom. That is until Hidan, the crazy insane psycho Jashin obsessed lunatic, decided to say a few certain (*coughvulgarcough*) words that ended up pissing her off. **

"**Why don't you fucking come down here you stupid fucking bitch!" Hidan shouted as he tried and failed to hit her with his three bladed scythe.**

"**But it's much more fun up here silly boy." The young witch laughed as she winked at him as she once again avoided his attack. She quickly had her broom move to the side to dodge the blond terrorist's clay bird. "Your going to have to try harder then that boys."**

**Deidara twitched and looked to Sasori (I want him alive so he'll be alive *sticks tongue out*) as if for some sort of help. **

**The (awesome) puppeteer was too focused on using his puppet The Third Kazekage and it's Iron Sand technique. To try and squish or rather crush the tiny and (to him) annoying witch. **

**The Witch giggled as she sent a spell towards the iron sand and knocking it away. "Is that the best you can do?"**

**Meanwhile Konan and Pein were trying to come up with some sort of plan to corner the said witch and destroy her once and for all. **

**Tobi just ran around in circles freaking out and calling out for his sempai to help him.**

**Kisame tried to slash the witch with his trusty sword Samehade. While he did that and unfortunately missed, Itachi came up right behind Kisame, jumping up, and activated Sharingan making him faster then normal.**

**The witch, who was the target of Itachi's attack simply created a invisible shield around her causing Itachi to be forced back. Upon hitting the invisible shield, Itachi did a back flip in the air and skidded safely on the ground.**

"**Whoops. I forgot to mention about my shield. Silly me." The witch (who I shall give a random name cause I'm very weird like that) Kimberly giggled as she flew around happily.**

**Zetsu came out of the ground to discuss something important with Pein and Konan. **

"Leader… That witch… **I can't seem to sense her **chakra.**" Zetsu stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world and only complete idiots wouldn't figure it out.**

**Pein sighed before replying. "I know that Zetsu that's why Paper girl and I are trying to figure out how to dispose of her…"**

"**Paper Girl?" Konan exclaimed obviously pissed at him. "I'm locking my room tonight for that Pein.." (*falls over laughing* I-I'm s-sorry *laugh* b-but. I-I *laugh* h-had too XD)**

"**B-but that's sexy time…" Pein whined. (note if you haven't figured it out already this is crack!)**

**Zetsu had a shocked look on his face as his jaw was dropped due to the randomness of the so-called-Leader.**

**Meanwhile back with the fight…**

**Kakuzu was sending his thread tentacles towards the witch only to have one of her spells cut them like scissors cut paper. **

"**Oooo how cool!" Kimberly the witch (as if no one knew by now) said in awe.**

"**You stupid fucking Bitch. You know I can't wait to fucking sacrifice you to Jashin-sama! I'm going to tear you to fucking pieces!" Hidan shouted again at Kimberly.**

"**Can you please refrain from swearing? There could be little kids around you know." She scolded Hidan much like a mother would do to a naughty child.**

"**What The Fuck! FUCK NO! And I don't care about the fucking little bastards!" **

"**I'll ask you just once more… Stop swearing I don't like it!" **

"**Oh? And what the fuck are you going to do about it? Huh? You've been fucking dodging all our attacks like some fucking noob!" Hidan smirked as he made the noob reference.**

**Kimberly glared at them as she raised her hands and summoned a… (make your guesses!) Pudding Portal! Which sucked all the Akatsuki into it, therefore, covering them in delicious pudding as they were thrusted from their world to another.**

**(meanwhile in the other world... Or known to us.. The real world. Five girls were discussing random things in the park)**

**"I'm telling you Pikachu vs Golem. Pikachu would Win!" A crazed redhaired girl with bright green eyes stated loudly to her friend with wavy brown hair and deep brown eyes. **

**"What? Your crazy! Golem would win. It's earth vs electric Raya!" She argued.**

**"But then how did Pikachu beat Onix? hmmm? How? Tell me that Kat?" Raya questioned.**

**A brunette with blue eyes sighed and said. "Their at it again Ami-Chan." **

**Ami looked at her with her blue-green eyes and nods. "Think either will stop soon Aya-Chan?"**

**"Nope." Aya replied as she tried to tone them out. "what do you think Nicole?"**

**Said girl looked up from her book and stated quietly. "I think someone would've noticed the portal that came out of no where in front of us..."**

**All five girls suddenly stopped what they were doing at the moment to notice the amazing portal. **

**"It looks like it's made of pudding!" Stated Aya suddenly and looked like she was going to go insane from a dream come true.**

**"OMJ YOUR RIGHT! ... OW!" Raya yelled then rubbed her head from getting whacked by Nicole's book. "Nicolleeeee-sama! you didn't have to hit so hardddd!" **

**"hn..." **

**Suddenly the Akatsuki fell out of the portal covered in pudding.**

**"OW WHAT THE FUCK?" A purple eyed, pudding covered man shouted to no one in particular. **

**"oh Raya is that your twin?" Kat joked as she started laughing.**

**"shut up nya!" Raya looked away and started pouting.**

**Nicole was focusing more on the people who were covered in pudding then the bickering that was coming from her group of friends.**

**Ami was almost hyperventilating because of a certain red head that got up and was trying to get the pudding off of him. (sorry Ami-Chan don't kill me..)**

**Finally after many moments of silence, the well known _leader_ suddenly spoke.**

**"Where... are we?" He looked towards Nicole, seeing as she was the only one who wasn't freaking out from being teased, hyperventilating due to certain pudding covered puppet man, laughing due to teasing, or thinking about pudding. (... don't kill me please.)**

*chapter ends!*

sorry about all that and I hope it doesn't suck. Also my friends oc's... I hope I didn't screw them up... Also in the next chapter another oc may show up. Alex you know what I'm talking about... I hope.

Review people and I'll update sooner! :3 hopefully I can get 10 reviews that would be awesome! Thanks for reading and stay tune for the next one.


	2. Explination and pudding problems

Welcome to the second chapter of Akatsuki Crack to the Real World. I'm glad you guys enjoyed the first chapter, and I'm really glad I got four reviews already! It makes me happy! Happy enough to write another chapter and update sooner!

Now… I'm considering updating this story once or twice a week. And the same goes for my other stories. I just need to make a schedule so I can keep on track. Unfortunately I am not all that great at making a schedule, so that may take awhile. But until that is made I'll update whenever I can.

I want to thank the people who reviewed to A.C.T.T.R.W. First is Pacchiri Cherii, I'm glad you found this funny, and therefore I am happy to say I am putting up the next chapter. Now, KingofHeartless'09 yes it has begun and I hope you review again. Kakashi Forever I'm very happy you enjoyed it and I'm looking forward for your reviews. Kaitlin D, I love ya too and obviously I am updating or I wouldn't be typing every word that is in my head right at the moment. AbbyLovesDeidara I'm really glad you love it and it was your idea for the pudding portal so Thank you for that! Sasori's Strawberry you soooo would hyperventilate, also this fic is rated M because of Hidan, suggestive themes, and some violence. Not for lemony stuff… However there may be fluff later on, but that's basically it. Unless I change my mind XD.

I want to thank each and everyone of you who reviewed for Chapter one, and now I believe I should start the second chapter off with a disclaimer. Which shall be said by no other then Death the Kid from Soul Eater. Take it away Kid!

Kid: Raya does not own Naruto or her friends OC's… She also has a problem with symmetry, WHY ARE YOUR EYEBROWS UNEVEN!

O.O Because it's hard to make them even… NOW STOP YELLING AT ME! YOU'RE THE WITH THREE STRIPS ON ONE SIDE OF YOUR HAIR AND NOT THE OTHER!

Kid: *collapses* I know… I'm garbage. Complete disgusting garbage. I deserve to die! Place me out by the curve like the rest of the garbage.

=.= aww man… well while I try to cheer up Kid there… Enjoy the second chapter.

"talking"

'thoughts'

**Alter egos or a side of Zetsu. **white zetsu **black zetsu**

_**Sarcasm**_

(Author note)

-Recap: **Finally after many moments of silence, the well known **_**leader**_** suddenly spoke.**

**"Where... are we?" He looked towards Nicole, seeing as she was the only one who wasn't freaking out from being teased, hyperventilating due to certain pudding covered puppet man, laughing due to teasing, or thinking about pudding. (... don't kill me please.)**

*Chapter One (or two.. Depending on if you counted the Prolog as Chapter one.)*

**Nicole showed no emotion as she answered his question calmly. "Depends on who you all are."**

"**That didn't answer my question." Pein stated a bit annoyed as he tried to wipe some pudding off of his Akatsuki cloak.**

**Nicole sighed. "It wasn't meant to… I was just pointing out that I do not know you and therefore see no need to give you a straight answer."**

**Pein and Nicole begun having a glaring contest, as to see who had the most dominance. As the two were trying to figure out who had more power in leadership, a certain masked boy had already got most of the pudding off and was currently behind the group of girls.**

"**Hello Tobi is a good boy!" He exclaimed as he poked Raya in her ribs.**

"**NYA!" She squeaked from being poked unexpectedly. "WTH?"**

"**Hi Tobi is Tobi! And Tobi is a good boy!" He seemed to be smiling when he spoke from introducing himself.**

**Raya stared at Tobi as he spoke, she began to think. 'I wonder if his mask taste like a lollipop…'**

**The rest of the Akatsuki were busy trying to clean the pudding off of themselves. The pudding was very hard to get off seeing as it was everywhere and in everything. While that was happening they soon in a matter of seconds felt like idiots, when one of the girls across from them pointed out something very obvious.**

"**Why not use a water jutsu to wash the pudding away?" The one known as Ami-chan stated quietly. But since their all ninja's with super ninja senses they heard it and immediately questioned themselves about why they didn't think of that. **

**Pein blinked at that statement and then suddenly realized he lost the dominance glaring contest against Nicole. He brought his palm up to his forehead with a smack, therefore face-plamed himself. **

'**Why didn't I think of that sooner?' Kisame thought to himself as he quickly made the handsigns for a simple water jutsu. When he finished his handsigns, a large wave that came out of nowhere, swept everyone off their feet and into several trees that surrounded the large park. **

**When the water disappeared, the pudding was all gone, and everyone was practically clean, but wet. The girls who were perfectly dry before now were soaking wet and a couple were slight irritated. Meanwhile the Akatsuki got completely pudding free and actually looked like themselves then weird people covered in delicious pudding.**

"**What the fuck Fishface?" Hidan yelled pointing his scythe at Kisame. **

"**Fishface?" Kisame asked, clearly pissed at being called a fish. "I'll rip you to pieces! And besides you should be thanking me for getting all that pudding off us!"**

"**NOOOOOOoooooo!" Aya exclaimed suddenly, temporarily pausing the fight that was about to happen between the Sharkman and crazy religious guy. Everyone turned their heads to her as she continued. "THE PUDDING IT'S GONE! I wanted to try some!"**

**Nicole sweat dropped as she was trying to get the water out of her book. "Aya… I don't believe that is the problem we have to deal with at the moment…" **

"**But all the pudding! It looked so good." She argued slightly, before blinking and proceeded to ask. "What other problem?"**

**Raya stared at Kisame for a long while, her thoughts racing through her head. 'oh my Jashin! It's Kisame-kun! Yay! What should I do… play it cool or glomp him like the crazy fangirl I am… ARGH! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!"**

"**Crap. I'm all wet!" Kat stated suddenly as she started to pout.**

**Kakuzu was glaring at Kisame along with Hidan, while he muttered quietly about something having to do with his money. **(typical Kuzu am I right?)

**Itachi sighed as he used his chakra to dry himself, while trying to stay out of the bickering.**

**Sasori was simple taking in his surroundings before feeling a pair of eyes on him. When he turned to see who was staring intensely at him, he couldn't find them. Mainly cause the said person looked away quickly.**

**Ami sighed happily. 'He didn't see me stare at him.. Oh thank goodness that would have been embarrassing.'**

**Deidara was trying to figure out where they were. And if they were anywhere near a village or small town. 'Lets see… I don't recognize this area.. So it's safe to assume that I haven't traveled to this place before. Hm. It's also safe to assume that I probably have no knowledge of the wild life and plant life…un.' **(o.o Deidara-san is very smart… at assuming XD)

"**Pein… were are we?" Konan asked the fiery haired leader.**

"**Wonderland?" Pein guessed.**

**Once again Nicole had the urge to sweat drop again, she sighed as she tried to explain. "It's not wonderland… Aya.. Would you explain to them where they are please…"**

"**Um.. Yeah sure." Aya nodded as she looked at the Akatsuki and proceeded to explain where they were and that they were part of an manga called Naruto. **

***Three hours later***

"**so… your trying to tell us.. That we're part of some comic that some guy made up?" Sasori asked.**

"**Yes." Aya answered simply.**

"**That's **impossible.**" Zetsu stated. **

"**Zetsu has a point." Kakuzu agreed. "If we are just some fictional story that some guy made up then why are we here now?"**

"**Welllllll…" Raya started out of nowhere. Before being hushed by Katrina.**

"**And.. Does that mean we don't exist?" Deidara questioned.**

"**Fuck no! You bitches are fucking lying!" Hidan exclaimed as a small red pocket knife suddenly went past his head. **

**The Akatsuki went wideeyed from shock. More Hidan then anyone. As the group of girls just turned to look at Raya.**

"**What?" She asked innocently.**

*end chapter 1 (or two XD)*

Well that's it for that chapter. Please Review cause I'm already working on the next chapter. I seriously appreciate the reviews. Also any helpful tips to make this story better are completely welcomed! That's it for now people, I hoped you enjoyed this one. And be happy that I updated so soon.


	3. Swinging and Weasel tackling kinda

Welcome to the Next chappy of Pudding portal... and yes I did change the name XD sorry about that but it was for a good reason.. I mean who else would have a pudding portal as a name title? huh? Ok now for reviews!

Abbylovesdeidara= I'm glad I managed to pinned you so freaken well XD I hope you enjoy this next one. Kaitlin= hehheh yes Ami is staring at gingerhead already XD And I love reviews telling me you love meh updates! So we both win! Sasori's Strawberry= you know you would. x3 Aero13= I know I know... but it makes sense later.. kinda.. xD VampireWolfGirl= I'm glad you love this story and I'm glad you find it so funny. XD Here's another Chapter. XSweetXSourXSoulX= back off Kisame is mine XD well kinda. you can have Zetsu. and I guess I could share Kisame if you wanted LOL but I agree they are drool worthy. Thanks so much for the reviews everyone! Please continue to review and enjoy my weird humor. XD anyway onto the Disclaimer brought to you by Kakuzu!

Kakuzu: I told you I'm not doing anything unless you pay me.

Awwww but I don't have anything!

Kakuzu: then no disclaimer from me.

Fine! HIDAN! YOU DO THE FREAKEN DISCLAIMER!

Hidan: Why should I fucking do the fucking disclaimer?

Do it or I'll make you listen to Paris hilton again.

Hidan: *twitches* Fine I'll fucking do your fucking disclaimer.

YAY!

Hidan: Raya doesn't own the fucking akatsuki. Or anything else hell she doesn't even fucking own her own fucking self. Fishstick got those fucking rights.

HIDAN! O/O SHUT UP!

Hidan: Story fucking starts now *smirks as he runs from a crazy red head*

*Chappy start*

"**That was your pocket knife!" Kat answered a little pissed that she would be stupid enough to throw a weapon at an famous akatsuki member. An akatsuki member that was immortal too. **

"**Prove it!" Raya challenged. **

"**Guys…" Ami started.**

"**You know it was yours!" Kat poked Raya as she begun to scold her.**

"**It could have been anyone's!" Raya argued as she poked back.**

"**Guys." Ami started again a little louder then before.**

"**No one else here has a pocketknife that's red!" Katrina point out as she poked Raya again.**

"**Someone could have borrowed mine!" Raya stated defensively as she poked Kat once more.**

**Meanwhile that was going on the Akatsuki members were thinking about what just happened.**

'**Did that girl really just throw a knife at Hidan?' Itachi thought as he kept his face passive. **

**Kisame chuckled quietly at Hidan's shocked face.**

**Sasori didn't care at the moment only thought. 'That girl must be a lot of trouble…'**

'**did that bitch really throw a fucking knife at me?' Hidan was getting angrier by the second.**

'**I wonder who they call god on this planet… It doesn't matter. I will show them who the true god is! Muahahahahahahaha!' Pein smirked evilly as his thoughts for world domination went through his head.**

'**Oh great… Pein is thinking about himself as god… again…' Konan sighed as she watched her partner grin deviously.**

'**Tobi is a good boy! :D *does caramell dansen in head*' Tobi hummed the caramell song as he danced in his head.**

'**I'm **hungry… I **wonder what's **to eat **around here.' Zetsu drooled at the thought of food.**

'**Money money money… Must be funny, in a rich man's world.' Kakuzu grinned behind his mask.**

**Deidara was thinking about what should be his next art subject.**

**Back to the girls…**

"**Who would borrow your pocket knife Raya?" Kat questioned.**

"**You could have!" Raya nearly yelled.**

"**WHAT?" Kat asked shocked at the accusation. **

"**Guys!" Ami tried again to get their attention.**

**Aya sighed as she watched the two girls bicker.**

"**YOU HEARD ME!" Exclaimed Raya.**

**Kat stared at her clearly annoyed with the girl in front of her. "ARE YOU INSANE?"**

"**GUYS!" Ami finally yelled at them and successfully shutting them up. **

**Both girls looked at Ami confused and shocked at the same time.**

**Aya started to giggle at what just happened.**

**Ami sighed and continued. "It's getting kind of late isn't it?"**

**Nicole nodded. "Yes it is.. It's nearly 6 pm."**

"**6 PM?" Raya exclaimed loudly, as she started to panic. "ah crap ah crap ah crap!" **

**Everyone (mainly Akatsuki) looked at the crazy screaming girl as she ran around in circles swearing over and over again.**

"**She's late…" Nicole stated as if it was the time of day. (? :P)**

"**Ohhhhh…" The ten criminals all nodded their heads in understanding.**

"**I gotta go guys!" Raya quickly gathered her things, (including HER pocketknife) and ran trying to get home before the last of the sun disappeared over the horizon. "baiiiii!"**

**Suddenly someone spoke up.**

"**SHE THREW AN F*$*)(($*)G KNIFE AT ME!" The purple eyed, sliver haired, insane man shouted very loudly as he just realized what happened.**

**Nicole sighed as she walked over and hit Hidan very hard on the head with her book, and yelled as the book's spine collided with the top of his head. "NICKY CHOP!" (yes yes I know another soul eater reference… if you don't know it.. Either read the series or watch it.)**

"**So.. Boss.. What should we do?" Aya asked as she was considered in the group second in command. (Happy Onee-chan. Your second in command XD)**

"**I say…" Nicole answered calmly and collectively. (is that a word?) "We bring them in… observation, see if they can fit in here for the time being… until they are able to return to their world.. I suppose their our responsibility."**

**(dun dun dunnnnnn CLIFFY!)**

"**Well won't this be a bucket of fun." Kat stated sarcastically, cause she's awesome like that.**

"**What makes you think we'll follow you little girls anywhere?" Pein asked in a snark-ee manner. (fooled you XD and… I can't spell today) **

"**First off.. Pein-sama. We are not little girls. We're Teenage girls with the power to kick you're ass in DDR." Aya suddenly replied with a smirk. "We are also the ones who can easily find your crazy fangirls and lead them straight to you, in which you and your group of fellow shinobi will be captured and possibly raped. Now… what were you saying 'leader-sama'?" **

**Pein stared at Aya, mouth open and shocked at everything she said. **

**Meanwhile Kat was laughing her ass off in the background.**

**Pein finally (after ten minutes) managed to close his mouth and nod slowly.**

"**Great!" Aya smiled innocently as she clapped her hands together and looked towards Nicole. "So boss where are we going to hide them?"**

"**Yours and Alex's place, Aya-chan." Nicole said as she picked up her book bag and looked towards the group of confused Shinobi. "Come along. We're heading to Aya's place. Keep close and don't lose your head…"**

***Time skip to… you know it! Aya's and Alex's place***

**The Akatsuki stared at the dark, stately Mansion that stood before them. Only one word crossed their minds. 'Whoa….' **

"**Well this is were you guys are staying." Aya explained vaguely as she opened the doors. **

**Upon walking inside the mansion everyone looked up at the chandelier as a girl with straight swoopy emo bang chocolate brown hair swinged on it before suddenly jumping down and somehow tackling Itachi.**

"**OMJ! This is so cool!" The girl shouted happily as she stared at Itachi with her bright green eyes. "Where'd you find these awesome cosplayers?"**

"**Oh you know, Alex. They randomly poofed out of a magical pudding portal and came here cause Hidan did something to piss someone off…" Kat stated like it was the time of day. **

"… **pudding portal what the hell?" Alex asked a bit confused. "Do I miss everything?"**

"**Get. Off. Me." Itachi muttered angrily as he looked up at Alex, his Sharingan activated. **

**Alex stared at him with a huge smile before hugging him. "nope!" (lol stubborn x3)**

*end chappy*

Well Please review and I know... the ending may have sucked.. I'm really sorry about that. And alex you knocked down Itachi so... be happy xD


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